[And that's where their paths diverged: claiming ownership over the demon that tried to do the same to you wasn't the same as welcoming the devil, because one was a struggle and the other was an acceptance, the act of stepping into what one was truly meant to be outside of the expectations of society. That wasn't Akira's case. He kept chained and bound a beast that would prefer destroy and defile everything it could, and it was only through the strength of his heart that he kept it subdued to little more than chattering impulses in the back of his brain, easily drowned-out by the compass in the core of his chest steering him towards what he thought was right.
It wasn't always that easy though.]
it's all about controlling it I guess I don't really think there's any way to get rid of it
[He'd learned pretty quick the only way to quiet the urges was to sate them. Tearing demons apart in the middle of the night had helped, but it's a beast of a different breed here.]
did you really feel that way? when I became like this I just... I don't know. I don't think it's like, I'm gone, or I was destroyed or anything. but it's like I was mixed up with something else and now it's all so tangled up I don't know what was me originally or what might've been something else I guess I'm happy that I'm "me" enough? or, that I'm "me" enough for people to still recognize me but idk. it feels weird sometimes
yeah he's fine he slept a bit but then he went back to normal
[Thank fuck.
He's about to tell her that it was strange, how he'd acted, that he wasn't usually like that, but he pauses at the question. It... well, yeah. She'd think it was the first time, wouldn't she?]
oh no he's seen me like that a bunch of times honestly he's seen me a lot worse. I... I can get a lot bigger and meaner-looking than that
no subject
It wasn't always that easy though.]
it's all about controlling it I guess
I don't really think there's any way to get rid of it
[He'd learned pretty quick the only way to quiet the urges was to sate them. Tearing demons apart in the middle of the night had helped, but it's a beast of a different breed here.]
did you really feel that way?
when I became like this I just...
I don't know. I don't think it's like, I'm gone, or I was destroyed or anything. but it's like I was mixed up with something else and now it's all so tangled up I don't know what was me originally or what might've been something else
I guess I'm happy that I'm "me" enough? or, that I'm "me" enough for people to still recognize me
but idk. it feels weird sometimes
yeah
he's fine
he slept a bit but then he went back to normal
[Thank fuck.
He's about to tell her that it was strange, how he'd acted, that he wasn't usually like that, but he pauses at the question. It... well, yeah. She'd think it was the first time, wouldn't she?]
oh
no he's seen me like that a bunch of times
honestly he's seen me a lot worse. I... I can get a lot bigger and meaner-looking than that